Sober Ninja

Trying not to get too cocky and ahead of myself but tomorrow I will be 18 days dry and that is the longest streak I have done for a long time according to my ‘try dry’ app – which is fab by the way if anyone starting out is looking for a good app. My skin has been horrid for months, at any time at least 6 big sore spots full of yuk (TMI sorry!) and this week – hurrah – there are no spots! just the red scars to remind me – because of course I pick at my skin like an addict only would and I’m unable to let something just heal….I’ve learnt the hard way – my skin will manage to even out I’m sure, Im just able to look in the mirror now without feeling anxiety about it!

I feel like setting myself the ‘big challenge’ has made it easier to not allow myself to drink – I know that sounds daft, but I mean usually by now I’d be thinking of excuses as to why I could have a ‘night off’ or ‘just one’ which inevitably we know where that always leads….now that thought comes and I just think – “people have paid you to do this, you can’t let them down”. And I wont!

Relief

Since openly announcing to everyone that I would be alcohol free for the next year, I have felt a huge sense of relief. I feel like I don’t need to explain myself if people ask why I’m not drinking – I’m doing a challenge – I mean I can go into more depth if I want to but sometimes a bounce back reply is all you need. The sponsorship from people for my chosen charity is more than enough to keep the fire inside me going. I know it’s not permanent and I need to change my whole thoughts about alcohol, but I feel safe for the next year and I’m really confident that the habit will be so unlearnt by then that I know how to stay on the sober path.