39

Day 14 has been good for me, so far the last two weeks have been ok (bearing in mind I have done these days soooo many times before that I know the hard times will come but I just know I am armed and able to cope with them now. For me it gets harder further down the line I think…and then I would have a cycle of lots of binge drinking in a short period of time, like say every other night or so for 2/3 weeks and then stop again for a while…so I recognise that that is more my cycle at the moment, and knowing that I am now able to step outside of the cycle and see that it is longer than I thought….so having a few weeks off doesn’t mean Im fine, Im still in the cycle, until I’m much further down the line, Like I can’t rest on my laurels until I’m past 6 months, a year, and I know I will get there now.

Wins over the last few weeks have been –

Celebrating my birthday sober (39)

Not wanting to drink while I spent a week away with my sisters last week in a caravan with dreadful weather! I could have easily passed the time in the bar, spending loads of money, or drinking wine in the vans with my sisters while the kids drove us mad…instead I put the kids first, I was there for them, they wanted to drive somewhere, I could do it, my sister needed nappies at 10pm one night, I drove to get them, no problem. My eldest wanted to go back to van earlier than us all but there was only one key – I was more than happy to walk her back and then go back for the other kids – as I walked her out of the bar I thought to myself I would have never done that if I was drinking, I would not have left the bar, or if I did it would be to buy sneaky wine or vodka to drink on the way there and back so I could have some extra units my sisters didnt know about…..I was proud of that, I put my kids first, not alcohol like I have done so many times in the past.